happy saturday afternoon y’all! since it’s the last couple days of march, i wanna take some time to celebrate my one year anniversary of moving out on my own. i moved out of my parent’s house to my own condo around this time last year and have learned hella life lessons and so much about what i could do on my own without having my parents, but specifically a man around, aka my wonderful dad. today i’ll delve into what led me to making the decision to leave the safety and comfort of my parent’s house and what i’ve learned along the way. this is for any of y’all who might be thinking of making this big move or maybe you just care about how i learned the hard way what adulting is really like. either way, enjoy!
first things first, i started by full-time big girl job august 2016, literally a month after finishing grad school, where they unfortunately don’t teach any real life adulting sh*t. i was commuting about 1 hour and 15 minutes one way every day during morning and afternoon rush hour. i could literally feel myself slowly dying inside. i absolutely hate driving and if you know me, you know i have a significant amount of road rage, so it is not a calm and decompressing experience for me. i knew i could not sustain that if i was to continue at my job, which i sincerely wanted to do, so i was like well then – if i’m not going to change my job, i have to change where i live.
long story short, i survived a miserable daily commute for all of 2017 so that i could save money to move out on my own and be able to afford my lifestyle. and by that i mean all the necessities plus the ability to afford all the makeup, wine, and chips that i know i need to survive on the regs. i knew i didn’t want to move out only to become broke. not that there’s anything wrong with having to move back to my parent’s house if things didn’t work out, but i really didn’t want to move out until i was financially ready. setting that goal was literally my daily motivation to get myself through the soul-sucking commutes.
i want to mention that the process of finding an apartment for yourself in the city is kinda difficult. i made a list of neighborhoods i wanted to live in but my ideal goal was to move out to the condo units in the west loop that my sister and her husband live in because it would mean being close to family (my sister is one of my bffs), being familiar with the area since i was already spending so much time at my sister’s, and being close to most parts of the city. it’s also only 30 minutes from my parents and my bffs’ houses so i’m able to easily go back and forth.
this is where i really think the universe and fate were legit on my side. i was all over apartment finder trying to find a place, when my brother in law informed me that a unit had suddenly become available because the renters who had my place before me made the decision to end their lease early. it was such a happy coincidence and tbh it ultimately just felt like this place was meant for me. so anyway, fast forward a year, i live next door to my sister, her husband, and their 22 month old dog who’s basically also kind of like my dog too. my life is kind of like the scene at the end of my big fat greek wedding when the couple ends up living down the street from the parents. (insert quote from the bundt cake scene). so with all that being said, here are some things i’ve learned in the process:
- how to woman up, grow some lady balls, and kill the bugs that love to come out and try to ruin my life, like that one time i destroyed a giant spider in the bathtub at 11pm despite my intense arachnophobia and then called my parents crying
- carrying all my groceries/bags in one trip up three flights of stairs because i ain’t about that multiple trips back to the car life
- taking the garbage out to the giant dumpster that’s hard to open and gracefully throw your bag in while avoiding as much physical contact with the dumpster as possible all while being 5’4″
- paying all the bills on time because if i don’t pay one, it’s not like there’s somebody else to remember and do it for me
- having to really analyze my gas and power usage…like do i really need my thermostat to be at 70 degrees or maybe i should just wear my jacket indoors?????????
- realizing it’s hard to call businesses like people’s gas and comcast during their customer service hours when i work during those exact same hours
- having the heat break and wishing it would just magically fix itself instead of having to coordinate getting it fixed
- having a panic attack when i wake up late for work because there’s no one around to wake me up and tell me my alarm has been ringing for 45 minutes straight (the amount of alarms i have is concerning)
- trying not to let the furniture guys who brought up my couch and mattress pull a fast one on me just because i’m a woman
- figuring out what’s wrong with the wifi when suddenly it’s not connected or telling me that my password/network is invalid when i know d*mn well that’s not the case
- pouring drano down the shower drain every couple months because i’m not trying to go swimming in the shower
- digging my car out of a million inches of snow
- realizing how difficult it is decorating a christmas tree by myself
- doing all the gross cleaning that makes me feel like taking five showers after
- not having anyone to open a jar for me that i’ve almost thrown at the wall because i almost couldn’t get it open
- having to do all the things when i’ve had a bad day and just want to be comforted/taken care of but learning how to do that for myself too
i’m sure there’s more but this list is long enough. it may seem like i’m spoiled and b*tch that’s because i am!!! did i mention that my parents are the best and i’m privileged af?! adulting hit me like a ton of bricks but there are definitely days that it’s easier than others. i couldn’t do this without the constant support from my family and friends. what i’ve really learned is that there probably isn’t something that i can’t do for myself. except put together my fake christmas tree…i really needed my dad’s help with that one LOL. if you’ve made it to this point, thanks for reading! i hope it was helpful or at least entertaining ok love y’all byeeeeee!
